A while back someone emailed me a great success story. I saved it on my computer
and forgot about it. Last week I was going through my computer and found it. I
thought, "Wow! - this is a really great story," and was planning on
using it in my last newsletter. But, then, as I was reading through it, I
thought to myself, "there is so much good stuff going on here, I could do a
whole newsletter on it." And that's exactly what I'm doing. Enjoy!
"Hey Swinggcat! There once was a time when I would walk into a bar, look at
all the beautiful women having fun with guys who were NOT me, and get depressed.
So I'd start drinking, and that would only make me more depressed. Eventually
I'd go home alone, hating the world, hating women, and most of all, hating
myself for not even TRYING to have fun.
Bars and clubs can be an intimidating environment. Until recently, it wasn't in
my reality to believe that I could actually make out with a girl in either
location. Sure, I'd seen guys do it before, but to think that *I* could was just
beyond any logical reasoning my mind could grasp.
But in reading through Swinggcat's book, there was a chapter that really stuck
out at me. That was the chapter on FRAMES. As Swinggcat defines it, a frame
determines the underlying meaning of behaviors and actions.
I've found this is a *key* concept in understanding any interaction with women.
When you enter a situation you may feel uncomfortable with, the natural
inclination is to be overwhelmed by the FRAME your environment presents. If you
allow this to happen, you effectively give up any control over your behaviors
and actions. This is the worst possible thing you can do if you are hoping to
meet the girl of your dreams. Controlling your FRAME, and setting the right
FRAME, as opposed to adopting the FRAMES presented to you, is the most powerful
tool there is in getting a woman.
Allow me to demonstrate what I mean.
I was recently in a very trendy club in Los Angeles. It was the kind with some
low level celebrities, some incredibly beautiful women, some incredibly rich
men, sexy go-go dancers swinging around on poles, trendy techno music, and
tastefully pornographic movies projected on the walls. In short: IT WAS THE MOST
INTIMIDATING ENVIRONMENT KNOWN TO MAN!
So there I am, a guy who's about 50 lbs. overweight, who's bald, and who makes
$30 Grand a year, hob-knobbing with models and porno stars. And wouldn't you
know it, the same feeling I got when I went to a bar in the past began to creep
up on me. But because I was able to understand the concept of controlling my
FRAME, I was able to do something amazing.
I set the frame that I'm having a good time, that all the girls in the club
liked me, and that I was going to have fun with them. Before long, I found
myself in a conversation with a beautiful girl who is a model. In fact, she told
me she's going to be on the next season of "America's Next Top Model."
Because I approached her with a strong frame of having fun and that I was the
PRIZE, she was very responsive to me. She eventually got dragged away by some
friends (as is apt to happen in clubs). But later on, I saw her talking to a
group of guys who were obviously trying to hit on her.
But because my frame was so strong, I walked up to the group, took her by the
hand, and literally LEAD her onto the dance floor, away from all the moes she
was talking to, who watched in stunned silence and a poor, bald, fat guy grinded
away with this amazing girl in front of them. And not only that - SHE WAS INTO
IT!
So there I am, body pressed up against this girl, having the best time in the
world, and I think to myself "I should make out with her!"
So I did. I grabbed her and planted one right on her lips. And not only did she
react well, but she reciprocated! Before long, our tongues were in a fencing
match with each other, and I was the envy of about 78% of the club. It was a
reality shattering experience for me, because until that point, the only place
I'd ever made out with a girl was either in my car or in the bedroom after about
3 or 4 dates.
So what was different? The answer: My Frame! I set the frame where I was the
PRIZE, where she was trying to win ME over, andwhere she wants me so bad that
she WANTED to make-out with me. And because I set the strong frame, the model I
was with WENT ALONG WITH IT! Now, I can now go into a club without that sinking
feeling of depression dragging me down, because I know it is possible to not
only have fun, but to meet any girl I want and make-out with her! You just gotta
have the right frame.
Thanks Swinggcat!" - M from Pasadena
My response:
Damn! - talk about a geek to sheik story. This guy went from "classified
gimp" to "certified pimp." What was is it that allowed him to do
this? The sole enabling factor was this: He understood the power of ESTABLISHING
himself as the PRIZE when interacting with women. In my book I call this
PRIZABILITY.
As those of you who have been following my newsletters and have read my book
know: ATTRACTION is not what a woman prefers. ATTRACTION is creating the emotion
inside a woman of wanting, reaching for more of you. The art of creating this
emotion inside women is what call PRIZING.
You cannot, however, create the emotion in a woman of her wanting and reaching
for more of you if she does not perceive you as being the PRIZE. Put in other
words, before you can ATTRACT her, you need to set the groundwork that you are
the PRIZE. You can't make a woman want more of you if she does not view you as
having any perceived value.
Even having good looks and lots of money, in and of themselves, doesn't
necessarily suffice in establishing that you are the PRIZE with women.
A more efficient way of ESTABLISHING yourself as the PRIZE is through developing
specific social skills. Learning to, for example, tell stories, cold read, be
intriguing, develop your sense of humor...and so on. I do all of these things,
and, in fact, I teach them in my book.
The most powerful way, however, to establish PRIZABILITY is to ALWAYS define the
underlying meaning of your interactions with women as you being the one who is
the PRIZE. In my book I call this the META-FRAME.
In fact, all of the other methods for establishing PRIZABILITY - such as,
telling stories, cold reading, being intriguing, saying something funny...and so
on - only work in conjunction with you defining the META-FRAME as you being the
PRIZE.
If you are doing a bunch of things to try to ESTABLISH your PRIZABILITY with a
woman - such as, story telling and acting funny - but you are not defining the
underlying meaning of your interaction with her as you being the one who is the
PRIZE, you will, unknowingly, establish negative PRIZABILITY.
Put in other words, doing or saying things to increase your PRIZABILTY within
the context - or META-FRAME - of you not being the PRIZE will inevitably make
you look needy, pathetic, and desperate.
Before learning anything else about dating or ATTRACTING women, you need to know
how to ESTABLISH the META-FRAME that you are the PRIZE in the interaction. Even
if you have all of the social skills in the world, without knowing how to set
the META-FRAME your skills are worthless when comes to ATTRACTING women. If you
do not yet have a handle on this, you need to read my book:
When you are fat, bald, and broke, like M from Pasadena, a woman's default
assumption is probably going to be that you are not the PRIZE. To make matters
worse, your default assumption about yourself might be that you aren't the
PRIZE.
As M from Pasadena tells us: "When you enter a situation you may feel
uncomfortable with, the natural inclination is to be overwhelmed by the FRAME
your environment presents. If you allow this to happen, you effectively give up
any control over your behaviors and actions. This is the worst possible thing
you can do if you are hoping to meet the girl of your dreams. Controlling your
FRAME, and setting the right FRAME, as opposed to adopting the FRAMES presented
to you, is the most powerful tool there is in getting a woman."
M refuses to allow society, his environment, and the people he is around to
dictate his FRAME and META-FRAME.
Just doing this can establish PRIZABILITY because it conveys to women that you
are in control of your power, have a strong sense of self, and have an
unswayable REALITY. These are all qualities women find PRIZABLE in men.
M continues: "I set the frame where I was the PRIZE, where she was trying
to win ME over, and where she wants me so bad that she WANTED to make-out with
me. And because I set the strong frame, the model I was with WENT ALONG WITH IT!
Now, I can now go into a club without that sinking feeling of depression
dragging me down, because I know it is possible to not only have fun, but to
meet any girl I want and make-out with her! You just gotta have the right
frame."
Let's remember, he didn't play tonsil hockey with just any girl, he did it with
a woman who is going to be on the next season of "America's Next Top
Model." And he was able to do this in spite of being fat, bald, and broke -
all because he established the META-FRAME that he is the PRIZE.
When you ASSUME that you have perceived value, and KNOW how to establish the
META-FRAME that you are the PRIZE, women will see you as a PRIZE they want to
win over - and it doesn't matter if you're fat, or bald or broke...or whatever.
If, however, you are good looking and rich yet do not have the skill set for
establishing the META-FRAME that you are the PRIZE, your success with women will
be mediocre at best. That's how important the META-FRAME is. With some guys, it
almost seems like they were born with it. Not me. I had to learn how to
establish the META-FRAME through a lot of experimenting and hard work. If you
want to save yourself truck loads of time, start learning to establish the
META-FRAME with every woman you interact with by downloading my book today. Just
think what it will be like to finally have the skills and confidence to plop
your butt in the driver's seat while interacting with women, giving you the
power and choice to take your interactions with them in the direction you want.
My book is the only place you can learn this information. Start getting this
area of your life taken care of right now by downloading my book.
(Your affiliate code)
Your Loyal Dating Coach,
Swinggcat "Dr. of Attraction"
________________________________________________
Copyright 2005 Superior Living Inc. All rights reserved. Swinggcat and
RealWorldSeduction are trademarks of Superior Living Inc.
If you consider we break the law of copyright on this article
click here
and write us about it, please. We will remove all your articles. Thanks, sorry for your time!
Looking for real singles? Find someone now on the world’s largest online dating network:
Match personals and beyond!
Post a ad photos. Join free, anonymous and instantly! Meet your soulmate! 1000 new photos posted every day.
Meet someone NOW!
